Walmart

You know a story titled "Walmart" will be good right?

Today I was at Walmart, mostly because Addy is a little sick, and I didn't feel good about taking her to the gym, but felt fine about exposing thousands of people at Walmart. We must leave our house everyday. It is a necessity. And it was rainy, so we couldn't just play outside.

Anyway, that's how I came to be in the craft section at Walmart. If you went there today, specifically to the sewing section, just quite reading now.

Ok, you're all sure you weren't there?

Then let's continue. I'm walking along, somehow managing not to let Addy drag all the "blankies"  (fabric bolts) into the cart. I practically trip over something on the floor. I look back and almost pick it up, thinking it is something Addy has knocked off the shelf. But as I lean down, I realize. Hey, wait, that looks like black underwear. That's disgusting! How does a pair of underwear come to be in the aisle of Walmart?! Walk away. Oh crap. I'm wearing the exact same pair of jeans and sweatshirt I wore yesterday. I wore black underwear yesterday. Are those MY underwear?! Walk more quickly. Avoid eye contact with anyone. Did that slip out of the back of my sweatshirt? Out of the leg of my pants? Was anyone around?!

And that is how, I do believe, my underwear came to be on the floor of Walmart. Being unwilling to find out for sure if they were mine, we left them there without further investigation.